The headline of an August 9 article on reason.com reads, “Chicago Opens First Marijuana Clinic, Despite Total Lack of Actual Legal Marijuana.”

The Illinois medical marijuana law kicks in January 1, 2014. The law lists

[tippy title =”40 specific conditions”] cancer, glaucoma, positive status for human immunodeficiency virus, acquired immune deficiency syndrome, hepatitis C, amyotrophic lateral sclerosis, Crohn’s disease, agitation of Alzheimer’s disease, cachexia/wasting syndrome, muscular dystrophy, severe fibromyalgia, spinal cord disease, including but not limited to arachnoiditis, Tarlov cysts, hydromyelia, syringomyelia, Rheumatoid arthritis, fibrous dysplasia, spinal cord injury, traumatic brain injury and post-concussion syndrome, Multiple Sclerosis, Arnold-Chiari malformation and Syringomyelia, Spinocerebellar Ataxia (SCA), Parkinson’s, Tourette’s, Myoclonus, Dystonia, Reflex Sympathetic Dystrophy, RSD (Complex Regional Pain Syndromes Type I), Causalgia, CRPS (Complex Regional Pain Syndromes Type II), Neurofibromatosis, Chronic Inflammatory Demyelinating Polyneuropathy, Sjogren’s syndrome, Lupus, Interstitial Cystitis, Myasthenia Gravis, Hydrocephalus, nail-patella syndrome, residual limb pain, or the treatment of these conditions [/tippy] under which an individual can get a permit. (Note: It’s not called a “prescription.” That’s reserved for medicine.) It also specifies that there must be an existing doctor-patient relationship. The intent of course, is to discourage the sham clinics that dominate the marijuana market in other states.

Modeling the pot business she started in Michigan, Good Intentions LLC owner Tammy Jacobi states, “We’re going to be establishing relationships with our doctor. We’re encouraging patients to contact

[their] primary doctors first but we want people to know that we’re here, they can talk to us, find out if medical marijuana may be right for them.”

So, if my regular doc won’t give it to me, I can go to these guys. But I better start talking to them now, so we can have a “bona fide physician-patient relationship” by January.

Chances are, if you want a pot permit, you can get one. The legal limit of 2.5 ounces of medical marijuana every 14 days is meaningless. Once you have the permit, a positive test for THC is easily explained.

And if your employer doesn’t like it, then what? That’s where we can help.